I am going to be getting married shortly.The girl that i am proposed to is pious and Deeni conscious,however im not too sure of getting married to her because she is not as good looking as my friends wife and others.What should i do?
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu `alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
You compare the beauty of your friend’s wife to your “wife’’.
What would you do if your wife was more beautiful than your friend’s wife and you came across another woman more beautiful than your wife? When will this comparison stop?
Beauty is relative and competitive. No amount of beauty will fulfil you.
Furthermore, what if you your wife is extremely beautiful but she has bad conduct. She backchats you, screams at you and makes life miserable. Will you still enjoy her beauty?
Beauty is skin deep and temporary. If you chase a woman because of her beauty, what if her form and figure changed upon birth or due to unforeseen circumstances, will you change her?
If you found a woman who is reasonably good looking but has good values and sound character, you should be content with that.
The beauty of a woman is admired for a few days in the beginning of the marriage, thereafter one lives with the conduct of the person. Don’t be deceived by beauty. Don’t compare your wife to other women. Be happy with her as a person. Say to yourself you are happy with her.
And Allah knows best.
Mufti Ebrahim Desai;