Financial crisis in our Marriage

Question:

My husband works for his father. When we got married we lived with my in laws and so his meagre salary was sufficient because we had no expenses. However 10 years and 2 children later and with our own  house now,that my father purchased for me,my husband is still on that same salary. I don’t want to be ungrateful but because we are not financially stable my father pays for alot of our expenses and even purchased a car for us. My husband says he cannot leave his elderly father,although he has opportunities to leave, and I personally feel extremely pained to be reliant on my father. I know that our parents are not our providers and that sustenance is from Allah but does that mean we should continue as we  are currently??? What do you advise us to do?

Answer:        

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

As-salaamu `alaykum wa-ramatullahi wa-barakatuh.

Sister in Islam,

You refer to your present financial constraints. You also state that your husband cannot leave his elderly father. We advise you to assess the situation from another angle. Assuming your husband leaves his elderly father for the better opportunities you refer to, he may face the negative consequences of leaving his father. In that situation you may be financially stable but mentally unstable due to your husband’s concern for his father. The negative consequences of the mental instability could be worse than the present financial constraints which are being kindly filled in by your father. Instead of focusing on other job opportunities, your husband may discuss his financial constraints with his father and explore ways to increase his salary. Your husband may also consider starting a side line business to meet his expenses.

You may also consider some type of home industry. Baking, sewing, etc.

Sister,

Life presents many challenges. Make sabr and turn to Allah for courage and solutions to your challenges. We also advise you to recite سبحان الله وبحمده سبحان الله العظيم استغفر الله

100 times between fajr sunnats and fajr (fardh) salaah.

Rasulullah ﷺ said

يا ابن عمر من حين يطلع الصبح إلى حين يصلي الفجر، سبحان الله وبحمده سبحان الله العظيم استغفر الله، مائة مرة تأتيك الدنيا صاغرة راغمة، ويخلق من كل [تسبيح] ملك يسبح إلى يوم القيامة.

موطأ مالك ت الأعظمي (1/ 148)

“O Ibnu Umar, recite Subhanallahi wa bihamdihi subhanallahil azeem astagfirullah one hundred times between the break of dawn and fajr salaah. The world will come to you disgraced and humiliated. An angel will be created with every tasbeeh who will make tasbeeh (glorify Allah) till the day of resurrection.” (Muatta Imaam Malik)

And Allah Ta`ala Knows Best.

Checked and Approved by:

Mufti Ebrahim Desai.