Husband having a Relationship with a Married Woman

Question:

Assalamu alaykum

my husband has had a relationship for 2 years with a married woman I discovered 2 months ago.  I said stop if you want take a second wife.  It doesn’t stop.  I can’t get close to him thinking he’s also with that.  My question is this do I sin?  He wants me to be meaningful that is.  I should be good and accept.

Answer:

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

The relationship your husband has with a married woman is Haram (absolutely prohibited). The relationship is Zina (adultery) which is a major sin and is punishable by stoning to death in a country ruled by Shariah. Furthermore, the woman is married. The relationship is interfering with someone’s marital life which is another major sin. Your objection to your husband is correct. You cannot simply accept the wrong he is doing. If you do that, you too will be sinful. You have a duty in Shariah to stop him from his Haram relationship. You should even contact the woman with whom he has a relationship and advise her. If need be, you should inform her husband of her extra marital relationship. Rasullullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wassalam) said:

مَنْ رَأَى مِنْكُمْ مُنْكَرًا فَلْيُغَيِّرْهُ بِيَدِهِ، فَإِنْ لَمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَبِلِسَانِهِ، فَإِنْ لَمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَبِقَلْبِهِ،

وَذَلِكَ أَضْعَفُ الْإِيمَانِ (مسلم:78)

Translation: “Whoever sees a wrong being perpetrated, he should prevent it with his hand. If he is unable to, then with his tongue. If he is unable to, then with his heart and that is the weakest form of faith.”

Accordingly, you should do whatever is possible to stop the Haram committed by your husband and the married woman. It is not permissible for you to submit to your husbands request to be good to him and accept. In fact, you should put pressure on him to leave him if he does not desist Haram. Tell him that you’ll are Muslims and you are meaningful in your response. If you do not stop him from the Haram, the curse and anger of Allah Ta’ala will fall on both of you. Your advice to him to take another wife is correct to avoid sin.

You enquire if you will be sinful if you do not get close to him. If by that, you refer to intimate relationship, then he must give you an undertaking that he will not commit Haram if you get intimate with him. If he persists with his Haram despite you fulfilling his intimate needs, then you will not be sinful.

We also advise you to turn to Allah Ta’ala, perform Salaatul Hajaat and make Dua to Allah Ta’ala to put effect in your conduct to change your husband.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

www.idealwoman.org