Advice To Those Getting Married

Question:

I’m going to get married soon. I need to be prepared for a great responsibility ahead before and after marriage. I’d like to have your advice/suggestion regarding activities/plans to be followed before and after marriage including intimate life. Please forgive me if its shameless to ask but I don’t have anyone to ask personally. I will be happy if you could provide me with some books and recommendations regarding marriage and intimate life with the husband. If there are any downloadable ebooks please help with that as well.

Answer:

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

You are to be commended for taking the initiative to further your knowledge. Shyness in a woman is a great virtue. However, overcoming that shyness to seek a religious ruling or advice is an even greater virtue. In a hadith, the women of the Ansar have been praised for not letting their shyness get in the way of furthering their understanding of Islam. [i]

There are many aspects of a maintaining a happy relationship with your future husband. These include the duties and responsibilities of the spouses toward each other, the rights of each spouse, the correct procedure of nikah, the etiquettes of the first night, intimate relations and more. For this a comprehensive reading of the following books are recommended:

Kitab-un-Nikah – an ebook version is available at the following link:

http://ia601207.us.archive.org/13/items/Kitab-un-NikahByShaykhMuhammadYunusPalanpuri/Kitab-un-NikahByShaykhMuhammadYunusPalanpuri.pdf

Islamic Guide to Sexual Relations – an ebook version is available at the following link:

http://www.archive.org/stream/IslamicGuideToSexualRelationsmuhammadIbnAdamAl-kawthari#page/n0/mode/1up

Another great book that combines the illustrious teachings of our great scholars into one summarized version is “Ashraf’s blessings on marriage” which can be purchased at islamic bookstores online.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

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