My question is how to obtain Allah’s forgiveness and His blessing for my life? My life until recently has been full of immoral relations with many persons. I have committed terrible sins like cheating and adultery. All these relationships only brought me pain and suffering and deprived me of Allah’s blessing. My heart has been broken. Many people used me to satisfy their carnal desires but I believed they really loved me. I committed all this trying to find a loving partner but infact I ruined my marriage and my family broke apart. Allah has given me chances and I failed and broke my word many times.I believe that only Allah’s blessing can mend my broken heart. I want to marry and be a good wife. But now after everything I have done how can hope to regain Allah’s blessing? All my beginnings fail… I am now alone. Please help me.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
We commend you for your zeal to earn Allah’s forgiveness and His pleasure. Your experiences in life have thought you that all love relationships are superficial. It is natural for you to feel used and violated. Let your experiences lead you to the real love, the love for Allah.
In a Hadith Qudsi it is stated, Allah says: Oh my slaves everyone wants you for their purpose, and I want you for myself. Sister, this is true love. You want someone to really love you because you are you, not because of any personal gain.
That type of love can only be from Allah. You experienced false love. You saw how evil and bad it is. Lies and breaking promises are a norm in a false and superficial love. Now it is the time for you to turn to real love. Love for Allah. Allah is most loving, most caring, most truthful, and most appreciatative. You take one step to Him; He will take ten steps to you. You walk to Him, He will run to you. You spread your hands open, He will embrace you. Allah will give it to you all.
This spiritual love and connection with Allah is most satisfying. It has its own unique taste of closeness and comfort. The more you get closer to Allah the more you want to. You just feel Allah in your heart.Sister, do not despair, you are not alone. Once you sincerely repent and make a firm resolve never to repeat the sins of the past, be sure you are forgiven. Allah is all seeing and knows the inner secret of our hearts.He knows how hurt you are. He knows what you want now. Allah appreciates your regret and remorse. Do not doubt that.
Make a firm intention to reform yourself. Make full Hijab. Avoid intermingling. Perform your five daily Salah and read some portion of the Quran daily. Also read the English translation of the Quran.Be sure you are talking to Allah, your Beloved. Take out time in the morning and evening and make the Zikr of Allah, Allah 300 times with full love and devotion. You will notice the love of Allah building in your heart.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.